Consumer whore: the bulk edition

My first trip to BJs:

Superwoman: Look!  I found my favorite jeans.

Becky: They sell jeans here?

[ring!]
Superwoman: Hello?
Sassy J [on phone]: I’m in aisle four.  Where are you?
Superwoman: We’re in produce.

Becky: They don’t have sweet potatoes.  Only yams.  Can we put yams in the pie?

Becky: Wow, I could use some black beans.  Too bad you can only buy these cans in twelve packs.

Superwoman: They’re cheap–you should get them.  Don’t worry, they won’t go bad.

Becky: And where exactly will I put twelve cans of black beans?

Superwoman: Under the bed.

[ring!]
Superwoman:  Hello?

Sassy J [on phone]: Where are you now?

Superwoman: We’re in the Goya aisle.

Is this normal?  Do people really buy cans in bulk and store them under the bed?  Can I eat two pounds of feta crumbles before they get moldy?  How much extra gas do we burn by hauling around a twenty-five pound bag of sugar and a hundred rolls of toilet paper, anyway?

7 responses to “Consumer whore: the bulk edition”

  1. Dave E.

    Heheh. About 10 years ago I went to a Sam’s Club with some neighbors who had 4 kids. I got a little queasy when they each grabbed shopping carts that combined appeared to have the same square footage as my living room. They then proceeded to “shop”.

    I wish I had a nickel for every time I heard “Honey you got that end?” as they loaded up.

    Shit, I was a Teamster when I was 17. Those people were scary.

  2. Clair

    Superwoman found her favorite jeans in produce?

  3. Dave

    Wait a minute. There’s a difference between yams and sweet potatoes? I always thought it was the same product with multiple brandings.

  4. Becky

    If the YAMS god himself doesn’t know the answer to this question, then I sure don’t.

    I found this handy comparison chart. It’s a bit academic, though, and doesn’t address real-life questions like what happens when you make a yam pie.

  5. Jen

    I always thought Yams and Sweet Potatoes were the same. Thank you Good Grief! for edjumacating me.

  6. Sassy J

    I get the super store consumer whore award for spending the most on this adventure (which required Superwoman’s club card to get in). I confess to calling Superwoman multiple times (she is very indulgent). My burning mega-store questions included: “I’m in the baking aisle and they only sell condensed milk in 8 packs–do you want to split it?” Or, “I can’t find the minor’s broth anywhere–nor Karyo syrup–so if you see some, get me a vat.” And, now I wish I had bought the same jeans! I feel another trip coming on.

  7. Theresa

    “How much extra gas do we burn by hauling around a twenty-five pound bag of sugar and a hundred rolls of toilet paper, anyway?”

    It depends on whether you drive your SUV or your Hummer there.