I was feeling domestic and decided to make some couscous with sun-dried tomatoes–a decision that set into motion the great kitchen cupboard chain reaction of 2004.
The cupboard is a delicately balanced ecosystem, and one must use caution when re-arranging its contents. Alas, I did not take the proper safety measures, and as a result, a large jar of couscous, a bag of millet, and a beloved container of fancy peppercorn mixes fell to the floor. The lids and twist-ties were no match for the force of the impact, so all three of these round and bouncy items escaped confinement.
For a brief moment, I thought about invoking the three second rule, but then I remembered that the three second rule was debunked by some annoying high school guy as part of a science project, and even if it hadn’t been debunked, it would be impossible to get two pounds of aerodynamic foodstuffs off the floor in three seconds, and even if I could do that, there would be the unpleasant task of sorting the couscous from the millet, which I don’t really like anyway.